Be on the same team

I noticed a feeling after meeting Courtney and spending time together. It was specific, happened fast, and seemed important.

Sure, there are lots of big feelings in those early stages. I felt excited. I was having fun. I felt more secure and confident. I felt good.

All that’s great, but this thing was more nuanced.

You know all the weird fun stuff in relationships? The stuff like making plans and meeting new people and cooking and hosting parties and buying weird furniture from weird people on Craigslist and going to Target at 11 pm for jello shot ingredients?

Or all the hard stuff? Like deaths in the family or friends moving away or work frustrations or awful current events?

Or the disagreements or spats?

No matter the circumstances. No matter the fun or the hard or the bad. I always felt like Courtney and I were on the same team. I didn’t just feel it, I knew it.

Those early days were a long time ago but the feeling never left. Actually, it’s even stronger and cooler now.

I don’t like giving advice to new Dads. Probably because I was annoyed when people tried to give me advice (pride, ego, etc) and/or I’m not qualified.

This one seems important though.

Be on the same team as your spouse when raising a child. No matter the good. No matter the bad. No matter the fun or sad or exhausting. Be on the same team.

You both need it, but your kid needs this even more.